Corbyn Hightower with her husband and two babies. Credit: In Her Image Photography
It's our last day with a car. The recession forced our hand, and though we've been talking about it for months, it still feels shocking and disorienting having the time come upon us. We've had a tough two years. I was a sales rep in an industry that took a huge hit that fairly quickly reduced my income by about ninety percent. A few months later I was downsized altogether. In the interim, my husband Larry took a low-paying retail job after having been a stay-at-home dad for three years.
Sheepishly, I admit to lingering vestiges of better times. We have a beautiful washer and dryer. There's a fancy elliptical machine in my office, which is the only piece of equipment that gets any use in there. My laptop has been clicked shut and slid into its case ever since the Internet service got turned off. The fax is silent due to a lack of an incoming phone line. I am typing this on my iPhone, a fact which makes me blush furiously, but is the one thing I think I'll keep.
We were never good with money, my husband and I. Before we met and after we combined forces, too. Still, times were so abundant for several years there that we did manage to save a fair amount of dough in addition to obtaining some trappings of a more abundant lifestyle. I look back now, and I feel grateful for not having bought a house. We already feel like the poster children for the recession; a foreclosure sign in our front yard would have put the final rubber stamp of cliché on our tale.
The money we saved cushioned us enough to pay the difference between our cost-of-living and our new poverty-level income. Meanwhile, we began sifting through anything we could sell on eBay. We had the big-daddy of all garage sales. It took us a couple months to accept that the following non-essentials had to go: spring water bottle delivery, gym membership, health insurance, purchasing books, our CSA box, cable TV, and Internet connectivity.
Oddly, the day the wifi and cable TV were shut off felt like a liberation. No more of my husband playing Castle Age while eating dinner on his lap while I played Mafia Wars or Farmville in my office and ate solo as well. Where were the kids during that time? In the living room, using the coffee table as a dinner table and watching Sponge Bob. Now, we eat together every night.
Things the recession taught me: keeping your thermostat at 63 degrees in the winter and at 85 in the summer is uncomfortable but not fatal. Lesson two? You are not using your library enough. Do you know you can take out as many books as you want? And that they have free storytimes and craft lessons for kids? And that you can check out DVDs? Thankfully, my community has well-funded, thriving libraries. And parks. Parks are free. Another lesson: you can eat cheaply without resorting to Top Ramen. You don't *need* meat. Beans and grains will take you far. Another lesson: foodstamps are like a god descending from a cloud and telling you it's going to be all right.
Which brings me to The Recession Diet. I've lost thirty pounds this way! The secret? Not having enough to eat. Or, rather, not being willing to buy the high-calorie cheap kind of food that would keep us fat and calm, bellies full and minds softly-starved and docile. I always raised my kids to say "poison!" when we pass the Golden Arches. They know we don't eat strawberries until sunny spring days. We have always gardened and supported our local CSA. In better times, we bought raw milk from an organic farm.
We live, as I mentioned, on beans and grains, along with in-season vegetables and fruit. Thankfully, we have room for a decent vegetable garden (foodstamps pay for seeds,) and we have a street that's almost pornographic in its abundant fruit trees. Our orange tree has been so productive that its branches dip, groaning, to the ground. Our giant apple tree will grant us her gifts late this summer, and the pear tree shortly thereafter. We have an unofficial trading club with neighbors, some of whom have apricots, lemons, peaches, plums, blackberries, and cherries. The fact that we live in the fertile and temperate land of Northern California central valley is an incredible gift during these lean times.
Another recession lesson? Almost all durable goods can be gotten at thrift stores. Not Goodwill. Goodwill is waayy too expensive.
The month has finally arrived where we cannot pay the rent. We've long-since downgraded from a pristine rental with an elegant balcony and professionally-landscaped yard in a desireable suburb to a rickety, rambling old house in downtown, a stone's throw from the train tracks and the homeless shelter. Even so, with our savings gone and having reduced our expenses to near-zero, we still can't cover our nut. We need to infuse our bank account with a chunk of cash, preferably enough to make up for the difference between our income and out-go until our two younger children could enroll in public school, at which point I would be able to take a job--any job.
Finally, there is the car. We've been holding onto our car for practical and emotional reasons. Our pristine silver Honda SUV has been a vestige of another life. Even as everything is falling down around us, we still have our car. It struck the right tone with us--a handsome compromise between luxurious and sensible. It felt comforting driving my children around in it, as it had enough airbags to allow it to moonlight as a bouncy-house. The smell of the leather seats, the sturdy low-toned "chink" the doors made when they shut, the seat warmers on cold winter mornings.
And it's PAID OFF. Several years old, but paid for. One small and tasteful liberal bumpersticker and a hula girl stuck to the dash with poster putty, but otherwise impeccably maintained and in wonderful shape. We thought we'd own this car until we "ran it into the ground." It was the first new car I had ever bought, and I allowed myself that pride of ownership. Never until time for resale have I ever so appreciated the fact that it's a Honda, a brand that holds its value better than almost any other.
The new neighborhood allowed us to even consider this an option. We moved away from a suburban, planned community landlocked by busy highways. We could walk and walk for the pleasure and exercise of it through the residential streets, but walking or biking outside the perimeter was foolhardy and probably dangerous. The first week we lived there, I had saddled up my younger two in the double-stroller and headed out to the post office on foot. Cars blasted by us at sixty miles an hour as I pushed the kids through the weeds and high grasses on the shoulder-less thoroughfare.
The Hightower family goes birthday shopping without a car.
Now, though, we live in as densely-commercial as you can get while still being considered suburban. We mapped it all out, and truly, everything we need is within four miles. And yes, climate helps. We discussed it seriously for a few weeks, and then just like that, we'd written our craigslist ad and put signs on our car windows.
After a panicky few days where we worried if it would sell at all we finally got a serious offer from a young family. Tonight, they hand us a cashier's check and drive off in our last asset, so that we may keep our family afloat. I am sad, and yes I am a little jealous of this handsome couple that have weathered these tough years better than we have. They will enjoy the spoils of my success. They'll slide over the leather seats, crank the music, open the sunroof, drive down a road to adventures.
We briefly considered replacing our '06 Honda with a low-priced, older car. That thought depressed us. We'd still have the expenses of gas and insurance, plus the added unknown of maintenance and repairs. Then there was the morale-killer of letting go of our glittering silver chariot and replacing it with something like a dented Dodge Neon with over a hundred thousand miles.
I was half-joking when I suggested dumping the car-ownership idea altogether and instead spend some money on good, reliable bikes, trailers to tow cargo and kids, good locks and helmets and weather gear. The joke gained seriousness when we reasoned that it might actually work. It might feel good. It might feel like the right thing to do.
So, where do you go, here in the suburbs, with three kids... on the last day with a car? Turns out, we're not going to go anywhere. There isn't anything we need. And we have already begun to let go.
Credit: In Her Image Photography
Read Part II here. And stay tuned for further installments on how Corbyn's family is surviving the Great Recession...
Comments
Melissa Roberts wrote on 03.30.10, 3:28pm:
This article is amazing. Totally made me reconsider how I do things at home and what I really "need." Thanks, Shareable!
Janelle Elliott wrote on 03.30.10, 4:09pm:
Thanks for your perspective, Corbyn. What an amazing story! I love your positive attitude and look forward reading articles to come!
Jo Ellen Tippins wrote on 03.30.10, 5:15pm:
Wow... beautiful article. Making lemonade out of lemons... ever thought of publishing a book.. ebook?? You obviously have an abundance of writing talent ... thanks for sharing your heart. I pray that you and your family will continue to find diamonds on dusty roads...
Anonymous wrote on 03.30.10, 6:12pm:
Your blog is new to me but I love it. We're with ya, friend! We're growing what we can and making mistakes but hey, we'll eat some of it and that's good. In the meantime we have a LOT of fruit that someone before us planted (including the birds handling the blackberry planting) and have learned that if you don't go into stores, and you don't read the paper, you don't even know you need that stuff!
Hang in there. We had lean times when our kids were little and now they know how to live on next to nothing, too! Things will turn around and we'll be ahead of those folks who think they need that junk.
my husband used to look at our kids (all tow heads) and say "Our gold is all on top of their heads!" We were rich in boys - anybody can get money!
Merideth wrote on 03.30.10, 7:17pm:
Great article. It's kind of amazing how much more connected to the community we can be when we are not shuffling around in small metal boxes.
Lisa D wrote on 03.30.10, 9:10pm:
I love this article, very poignant and touching and personal. I hope you got paid for this :) Keep on writing!
Felicity Jones wrote on 03.30.10, 10:42pm:
Thanks so much for sharing this Corbyn. You're a wonderful writer and inspiration. I look forward to your next piece.
S E Garrett wrote on 03.31.10, 3:14am:
This is inspirational writing Corbyn. Although the times you are describing are hard, this is obviously on the tip of the iceberg and you've had two really tough years. My main concern from what you are saying, is how are you going to get to the point of being sustainable?
I read this post last night, and then this morning flicked through a newsletter from a website that is huge in the UK, the moneysavingexpert: I don't know if there is an equivalent in the USA.
There may be some ideas in this page you hadn't thought about http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/family/make-money : although most of the links and some ideas are specific to the UK, many are universal.
My very best wishes.
Anonymous wrote on 03.31.10, 7:55am:
Good luck to you all. We are in a similar situation, except we have that stupid mortgage and will probably be adding a "foreclosure" sign soon.
It's sad, but comforting to know that we are not alone. We will all survive this.
Drew wrote on 03.31.10, 9:11am:
Good luck from our bicycle friendly community to yours, I know it will all work out for your family when you live life true!
Jamie F. from Suburbia :) wrote on 03.31.10, 1:26pm:
Corbyn,
You are truly a solider of life with such a beautiful perspective both inside and out. You are an inspiration to those left behind in suburbia. Please keep us updated with your grace and wit. If you every need anything, please reach back to us!
CorbynHightower wrote on 03.31.10, 2:21pm:
JF: thank you for the loving and supportive words. :) Make no mistake, though--we are *very much* in the suburbs. It's just that we're not in *exurbia* anymore!
nirved wrote on 04.01.10, 6:30am:
really inspiring....remember watever happens , happens for the best ...let bygones be bygones.
Anonymous wrote on 04.01.10, 6:32am:
Thank goodness for the climate you enjoy and the abundance of fruit and vegetables you are blessed with! My husband and I, and our three grown children and their families live in a northern climate in Canada. What in Heaven's name will happen to people here during a serious recession! So much wasted land, perfect for productive gardens, lays barren, totally barren, unnecessarily. Such waste and such naivety. I personally think it's just a matter of time before each one of us faces hard times. Gonna be very interesting, I'd say! At least neighbours actually acknowledging each other's existence, and maybe reaching out to each other will be an outcome of trying times, I hope. God bless you for your optimism and strength and ingenuity! Judy
Anonymous wrote on 04.01.10, 7:46am:
Hey...
Keep going folks.. we are just there.... avoided depression and almost getting over with recession....
You still have heart and strength...
your kids looks fab...
take care,
Abhay
carol wrote on 04.01.10, 8:11am:
We've lived car-free for eleven years now, and never looked back. The money saved! Freedom from worrying about the next repair or how to save money for the next new-ish car. Ah, bliss. Plus seeing the world from a walker's perspective -- we miss so much going around in cars.
We live in the U.K. now. Lovely to live in a human-scale place. But we can live here because my husband is British -- I'm afraid Americans without foreigner partners won't have this kind of option.
We left the U.S. because of the hostility of some drivers to pedestrians (we lived in small-town Indiana). The threatening behaviour of some (and the actions of a few) made it untenable. Perhaps the Great Recession will put more people in your situation, and compassion and consideration will reign again among the American people, especially those who have cars. We can only hope.
A New Spiritual Messenger wrote on 04.01.10, 9:02am:
A Spiritual Message for You
Hello,
Our beliefs are very important. Not only do our beliefs greatly affect our current day-to-day lives, more importantly, our beliefs will greatly affect our afterlife.
And so I'd like to share these three spiritual beliefs with you:
1) We are all Perfect, Eternal/Timeless Spiritual Beings living in a realm of Perfect Harmony.
2) Yet it seems to us that we are imperfect human beings living in an imperfect world. Why?
3) Eventually, we will all return back Home to our original state of existence: Perfect Eternal/Timeless Spiritual Beings living in a realm of Perfect Harmony.
How to practice these beliefs:
Our first thought after we awake should be a positive, spiritual thought, looking forward with "positive expectancy" towards the new day. For example, we can repeat belief #1.
Sometime during the day read beliefs #1 and #2, ending with asking the question Why? Then spend some time silently waiting for a reply. We all have an Internal Guide/Spiritual Companion that will lead us towards Harmony.
Our last thought of the day should also be a positive, spiritual thought, looking back on the day with "gratitude", looking forward with "hope and trust" to awaking from sleep one step closer to Harmony. For example, we can repeat belief #3.
That's all there is to it. Try this for 30 days. If you find that it benefits you, continue; if not, don't.
Wishing you Harmony,
A New Spiritual Messenger
Anonymous wrote on 04.01.10, 10:09am:
Dear New Spiritual Messenger,
Wish that thought you said pays for the food everyday. The basic things that everyone needs are food, water and shelter. Even when you start a video game everyone starts at the same level..everyone has the same opportunities..But why is that all perfect almightly in his game with all beings produce children with no eyes, no ears, created places with no water, food. I dont want to think of a cruel person everyday and wate my time. Instead I want to get up and work for the basic things I can provide for my family. Sorry- spirituality doesnt help. It is only hard work that pays and living simple like she says in the blog that makes you survive through hard times. One can either ponder why and wait for reply or just do his karma(duty).
-Forever Human.
VASANTAJI wrote on 04.01.10, 11:03am:
What an amazing story and so beautifully written.Please continue to keep a diary of your lives. I envision this being published as a book. Oprah may even interview you!
Fay Margocsy wrote on 04.01.10, 7:45pm:
Dear Corbyn , sitting here with tears in my eyes after reading your inspiring story . I wish you and your gorgeous family all the luck in the world , you really deserve it .
It is amazing what we can do without if we try . Having said that I am married to a hoarder ( you know his daughter well , lol ! )
It sounds like you are rediscovering the gift of family - actually spending time together doing things as small as eating a meal together and talking about your day , as we used to do in the days before television and the like took over our lives .
On my calendar for April it says " Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take , but by the places and moments that take our breath away ".
God bless and good luck to you , I look forward to further posts .
Seattlejitterbalm wrote on 04.01.10, 8:12pm:
I so appreciate your straight facts of life. Thank you.
I'm also on the verge of selling our only car due to the fact that insurance and repairs are beyond our means. We have a cargo bike (Xtracycle) and I'm getting stronger every day with my almost-7-year-old riding behind. If what this all means is strength in every way, both physical strength and fortitude, then I'm good with that. Not to take anything away from the difficulty of keeping a roof over our heads or food on the table. My belly is full of dahl (legumes) that was prepared with one potato, one yam, and one carrot. Indian spices help; it was delicious. I believe the best food is simple and prepared at home.
I wish you all the best in keeping it together. Enjoy the spring!
tay wrote on 04.01.10, 9:10pm:
Very interesting and well-written article. I was mesmerized and couldn't turn away. Thank you.
Neal Gorenflo wrote on 04.02.10, 9:47am:
Very interesting survey I just found that shows many families are going through similar stuff, and coming to similar conclusions. Seems like a big shift, and a positive one, though beware, marketers are looking to co-opt this new sentiment, like always. Note that that survey was conducted by one of the largest ad firms.
Sustainability is the New American Dream (2010 post-recession consumer study): http://cot.ag/bV97H6
Rand wrote on 04.04.10, 6:35am:
I am not really sorry for this family - you are weathering it well! I am heading down the same road, albeit voluntarily - going minimalist, simple, etc. My car goes at the end of May.
Anonymous Coward wrote on 04.04.10, 9:37am:
I'm reading this from India. It's a place where poverty stares you in the eye so often, you'd feel guilty everytime you order a tall latte.
Fortunately, I have not needed to experience this poverty first hand, but looking at how people remain happy in their situation convinces me you have chosen the right solution- reducing our wants is the only way to contentment.
Good luck, and I'm sure you'll weather the storm.
Michael Bubb wrote on 04.04.10, 9:55am:
Lovely writing. Don't know what to say - wish you well.
Al wrote on 04.04.10, 10:07am:
sorry to hear what you are going through.
the good news is that the banks have been loaned billions to get the economy moving and they are lending that to the government to keep the public sector going.
And all the banks get is a lousy 3% of the total amount we are simultaneously lending to them and borrowing back from them.
sort of makes it clear who are economy is run for and where exactly Congress gets its secret checks
Delirious in Dallas wrote on 04.04.10, 11:10am:
How can we, your readers, help you?
You should add a PayPal donate button link as it appears that the proceeds from the "Donate" button go to Shareable, and not to you.
Please correct me if I'm wrong.
Gloria Ives wrote on 04.04.10, 2:00pm:
Beautiful dose of honesty. And the truth is our lives have the potential to get better with less. The by products of loss is so often gain; of a much more valuable variety: For one thing time. And all of the things we've over looked the value of, like homegrown vegetables, which there's nothing like, and the opportunity to use our limbs in the way they were designed, for transport- of both ourselves and others.
How much we still have despite our losses, and how much we've gained because of them.
Although my husband is fortunate to still have his job, I've made a concerted effort to remind myself what we have, and to use what we have wisely and more fully, then perhaps I had.
Your prose here is refreshing, and heart driven and I appreciate you sharing your point of view, and giving a voice to something we can all feel that much more now, than perhaps we did before.
www.booksaboutpeace-diggingdeeper.blogspot.com
Leo wrote on 04.04.10, 6:15pm:
Would love your recipes for the beans & quinoa. :)
Great job learning to live with less - very inspiring!
Rita wrote on 04.04.10, 7:47pm:
There are many things one can do at home to generate income. writing is the one I am focusing on these days, but there are others. You write well. Keep writing and I will keep reading your blog. Who knows where it will all lead. It's a new beginning.
Anonymous wrote on 04.04.10, 11:36pm:
You have three kids and consider health insurance "optional" but still spend $70 a month (or more?) on an iPhone???? Your priorities need some adjusting.
Karen wrote on 04.05.10, 2:51am:
Unbelievable......................and your words somehow sound calm to me. It reads as if you are peaceful. Is this possible? I immediately thought of how selfish we are, all of us...........to think these "things" are all ours. God can give and God can take away and we really need to let go. You have been such an inspiration to me. Here we are in debt up to our eyeballs wondering how we are going to get ourselves out but..................my hubby has a job and we have way to many frills. And you...............you are finding the meaning of life but letting go and giving up. Kudos to you and your family. You can come by our house any time and stay awhile. It just may take you awhile to get here. But seriously..........would you consider moving to another state? Our state may have more to offer you. Our church could help you. We would love to have you here and our basement is big enough for your family! Please contact me. We would love to help in any way that we can.
In faith and praying for you and your family.
Karen
Heather wrote on 04.05.10, 4:04am:
Just read:from Twitter
prayerbullets: Who remembered us in our low estate: for his mercy endureth for ever (Psalm 136:23).
1 minute ago
He will always be with you.
Anonymous wrote on 04.05.10, 9:23pm:
Great post. Know that you will be ok. Been married 30+ years and we are on our 3rd or 4th unemployment/recession. Luckily sold the house before the layoff but have downsized twice since then. Still have the cars but things are slowly leaving through Craigslist. This has been the worse downturn so I can't offer any words of wisdom other than a positive attitude really will keep you all together. My husband is hoping to qualify for retraining. Retirement isn't even something that we can ever think of and who would have thought he'd be going back to school in his 50s? I say it will keep Alzheimers at bay.....
Laryssa @ Heaven In The Home wrote on 04.06.10, 1:21pm:
Wow, you all have gone through a lot! I'm so glad you live where bikes are practical. Where we live it rains a lot and we have a long winter. I'm trying not to be jealous of your lovely climate. ;-)
Corbyn Hightower wrote on 04.10.10, 6:24pm:
Re: Delirious in Dallas--you are right, the "donate" button goes to shareable.net, a worthy cause! :)
Anonymous wrote on 04.11.10, 12:09pm:
What a truly inspiring story, both segments. I look forward to future installments. I too have had to downsize, and lost my car over almost 2 years ago. I am fortunate to be blessed now with a company car that we are allowed to use for personal use. Otherwise I would not have one at all due to expense, and do not live in a good area for bicycling. I have slowly come to realize over the last year that I am happier now that I was before in the bigger place with all the "amenities" I used to think were so important. I happiest now with simple foods, and simple activities such as walking, hiking or exploring libraries :-) Isn't it amazing how out of such hardship can come peace? God bless you and your family - keep sending out positive thoughts and energy and rewards that you cannot even dream of will come your way. I look forward to more tales of the Hightower family!
Deb J wrote on 04.12.10, 5:45pm:
Corbyn,
Thank you for this open and honest post. I pray that things turn around for you soon. I do understand your place. If our mobile home were not paid for we would not have a home. We have cut out everything but the car (it is paid for) because we are both disabled and need it for doctor appointments. If I could convince my mother to let us sell it we would.
Deb
Joyce wrote on 04.30.10, 7:27am:
I have known Corbyn since she was 20 years old and she has always been a beautiful writer and a strong and vibrant person. I have no doubt in my mind she will weather this period in a way that will continue to make me proud to know her. That being said: hug you, honey. It sounds so hard.
Rezultate wrote on 05.16.10, 2:33am:
Inspired article, maybe the crisis have a change role. In my country the real problem is clear now, is the same as for the whole world: we are too many and we consume too much, the civilization is on too high speed.
Carrie wrote on 05.25.10, 6:17pm:
girl, you seriously rock! What an amazing woman you are!!! Thank you for sharing so honestly - it's brutal all over right now, and every little bit that we can learn from each other helps. It's so much easier to say "things will be better soon" and gloss over the hardships you're going through but they might not be for many of us, and it helps so much just to hear that someone else is going through it/kicking a$$. Take care of yourself and your crew, and hope that the medical issues are short term only. (((((hugs)))) from a fan!
Tereesa wrote on 05.25.10, 10:51pm:
Carol I don't blame you for leaving Indiana. I have seriously thought about it because Ft. Wayne drivers are nuts. I mainly ride a bike or walk everywhere , but now thats not even safe no more with drivers. I wish you and your husband the best
Adrift in the Same Boat wrote on 06.09.10, 12:06pm:
My family and I are in a very similar situation. We are hopeful that things will turn around in the next 30 days, but it seems like we have been hoping that for the past year. We don't drive often, cut out all but the basics and reduced food spending. I will have to declare bankruptcy, which makes me ashamed, but I have no choice. I had a health crisis and lost my job...I feel lucky that we aren't homeless. Really, it is thanks to our family and friends.
I am sending my love and peace your way. I don't know if it will help any, but it is what I can afford to give to you. :)
Liz McLellan wrote on 06.09.10, 12:23pm:
Hey Corbyn,
Thank you so much for sharing your stories. What we tell ourselves is so important to how we get through. It is possible to thrive in these times through trading in "affluenza" and isolation and things for time, real community and a bit of elbow grease. I don't shop now, I read and garden and listen to lectures about neuroscience and permaculture on my used 2nd generation iPod.
I have no gym membership but I am fitter than I have ever been. I have no full time work - except my work which is full time - but I am in my skin doing what I think is valuable and useful not frazzled and stressed doing what someone else thinks is important.
I have no bright lights, or big city lifestyle any more - but my liver is happier and my dreams more interesting. I write a lot more. I think a lot more.
It is interesting though how important facebook, blogs and twitter is so important though. It's not possible to be alone in this...or it is if you are not able to get online. How strange and interesting that what is left is connection. Not strange actually - but very comforting.
Keep writing! We need your voice!
Lisa wrote on 08.09.10, 8:23pm:
Your lifestyle is amazing. I remember the days when life was simpler. We ate dinner as a family, did homework, played board games and played outside. Today it is video games and computers. We joke that kids no longer need to know the dewey decimal system which in turn saddens me. Most of my childhood memories are those that involve creative play not expensive trips or vacations. Remember when camping was the best vacation ever. I have to downsize to feel good again. However I have to own a car for medical reasons. My husband and I have not been affected by the recession but we never know what the future holds. We live in a small modest home so doubling up on payments will provide security. I wish you and your family the best. Remember God says that he has a plan for each one of us to grow and prosper. Your family has done both and will continue to be blessed.
Signa wrote on 08.10.10, 5:24am:
I just came across your blog after reading an article on yahoo. I love that there are more and more people trying to live a simple life. I try really hard to lead a very simple life, I have not had a car for more then 2 years now, however thou it seems that my bikes are not very reliable and sometimes people think they need them more then I do even when I have it locked. So right now I have resorted back to my legs and the public transit system. I live in AZ so its pretty hot right now so I don't make wasted trips that I don't need to. Sometimes grocery shopping is hard, but there is always the friend that has not chosen to give up their car that is willing to give me a ride. All my friends think we are crazy, but we live in a small 2 bedroom trailer that is paid for and all we pay is our monthly lot rent. Yes I still have some areas to work on such as the AC being set higher, or the soda that I like to drink, but with time I know I will live the simplest life I am happy with. Thank you for your blogs, I am going to try some of your ideas.
Neal Gorenflo wrote on 08.10.10, 12:59pm:
Signa, great to hear about the changes you've made. Inspiring.
One tip on grocery shopping. Sometimes I take one of those rolly suitcases with me to the grocery store. You can get an amazing amount of groceries in even a small one. It really helps if you need to walk home with groceries. I've even hooked one of them on the back of my bike to create a sort of trailer. It works really well.
I like this solution because:
-I don't have to use any bags, all items go right into the suitcase
-I've found another use for my suitcase then just when I travel
-The small rolly suitcases slide underneath a typical shopping cart, so it works with the existing infrastructure at most grocery stores
-Great for farmers' markets
-You can get used rolly suitcases for next to nothing. In fact, mine was free. I found a perfectly good one in the trash at the beach (a whole set actually, weird).
Holly wrote on 08.11.10, 7:17pm:
I just wanted to say that this was very inspiring! I too have had to give up a lot of things. I make my own laundry soap and do my clothes in my bathtub. I buy a lot of things at 2nd hand stores or goodwill (ONLY if it's a good deal bc they do tend to be pricey) or from the clearance rack. When my boys were little, I clothed diapers and not by using a service but doing it myself. I've gone w/out a car, though it would be near impossible for me to do that now. My sons have way too many specialists all over, not just in my city, for that to work but my van is paid off. I only have internet bc I got a job work from home that required it. I don't have cable tv. A lot of the things in my home are from freecycle or family members who didn't want them anymore. I really commend you though on the attitude you are taking w/it all! A lot of people who go through hard times, have the poor me mentality, but you definitely seemed to be working it out for the best. Good luck to you!
Nick wrote on 08.16.10, 6:47pm:
Thank you for sharing your story. If the world had more people like you, we'd be better off. I hope and (pray) things will look up soon.
Nick
Trevor Emdon wrote on 09.03.10, 3:12am:
What a fabulous tribute to the human spirit and the abundance of nature you are. Your children will grow up loving life and rather than focussing on ways to make money they will have an attitude of gratitude for life's natural riches - including the love they have from their amazing parents.
Good on ya for sharing your journey.
If it's of interest, or helpful, I have written a report called "Create Wealth With Your Mind" which you may find of interest. (There's no charge of course). You can get it from this link:
http://www.wizardofwisdom.com/creatingwealthreport.php
Sera Warren wrote on 09.14.10, 9:45am:
Thank you for having the courage to share this. So many families are going through this. We're included. I appreciate that instead of feeling bad about where you are in life, you are hopeful and optimistic and real. I'm going to try some of your survival techniques here. Our children are going to reap the benefits of how to be smart and make frugal choices.
Joe Wirkus wrote on 10.28.10, 9:10pm:
I am very sorry to say this, but it is my opinion that you people that are replying to her article saying, "It's so inspiring", or "making lemons of lemon aid", are all missing the obvious:
As I can relate; My wife and I are both permanently disabled and on a very low fixed income. Our house is literally falling down around us. Floors have sunk so far that the walls have separated from the ceiling by 3 or more inches, and cracks go from one end of the house to the other.
Has it escaped the minds of the readers that that family is actually in need? Sure, they seem to have a "we will make it, even if we can't" attitude. They are still in need of some help!!!
I heard a song lately that said if there was a time when nobody lied, and nobody cried, we'd see a day when nobody died", etc..
Well I know she isn't asking, and is probably too proud to ask for it, but if you are reading this, please consider your neighbor. If someone needs a meal, give them a feast; If someone needs a blanket, give them a bed. If they need, give them a friend. These are my words. I am inclined to believe we are all part of the same family. Even if you don't believe in God, you still have to admit, we are ALL in the family of mankind!
I'm not saying to give money to everyone who has a sad story.
I AM NOT!!! There are other things that can be done; And NO, I am not even talking about government or laws;
Think about this; If everyone who had a need had the need met; Example: Someone's car is broke, and you can help fix it, or perhaps even know a friend who can fix it, so you get it done. Or you know someone who has their dining room & kitchen floors bowed to the ground, and you know a carpenter... Get the point?
Want another example? Well, I think it was best put into a movie, "Pay it Forward"!
Imagine how nice this world would be if we all would act that way!
But let's all be real: Nobody cares about the person who is in need, unless it is devaluing their property, or is in a foreign country. Sure, help the starving children of third world countries. But start here first!!! There are still people effected by Hurricane Katrina, that don't have a home. There are people like the family in the article, that could really use some help.
Well, I am quite sure I have put some bees in somebody's bonnet. But hey, maybe tomorrow, or a tomorrow, when you are stuck in the mud, or out of a job, or Heaven forbid, ill and in need, you will be one of the lucky ones.
Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya?
Gabriela de miranda wrote on 11.04.10, 8:33pm:
Hi my dear friend. What an amazing writter you are. I did not know you guys were going through such taugh times... Your courage and your positive atittude assures me that you are going to be all right. I admire you from the bottom of my heart, and I love you and your beautiful family. Miss cracking up with you and doing the robot together. You are a huge inspiration to me.
Corbyn Hightower wrote on 11.26.10, 10:17pm:
Hello, kind sir.
Thank you for your considered response. I have been surrounded by such kindnesses since we started to struggle.
Having said that, if you or any one you know is determined to make a (much needed) financial donation, you may do so on my personal website, www.corbynhightower.com.
Thanks again for supporting me with such strength. xoxo
Emily fitzhugh wrote on 12.16.10, 9:41am:
How have I missed you! Thank god for the twitters :) A fellow Portland with a like mind. I can't wait to follow your blog. And I as well sold my car. I am a bike commuter through and through. A relief. A feeling of power. A feeling of knowing I am in line with my beliefs.
This is SUCH an amazing read. What a wonderfully inspiring story! Your family is a fabulous example of how we can all turn the recession into a glorious reawakening of our whole lives and every little morsel in them.
Thank you for writing this.. I look forward to more!